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| Kings College- credit: wikipedia.org |
Every student who returns from a year abroad will say that it
was life-changing. It doesn’t matter who you speak to about it, it will have
affected them in some way. Few people talk about the return in such a positive
way. But coping with the return to ‘normal life’ is just as life changing as
the time abroad.
After a year abroad, I have returned to complete my degree
in Aberdeen. Returning is strange, another first in three years: the first time
to repeat a setting. The location and people are familiar, but through a sort
of lens of nostalgia, as if I am returning from twenty years away rather than
just one. No longer being a fresher, in any sense, brings a new set of trials to
face, with a new collection of pressures and challenges. I am able to keep
going with what I want to do, within academia and out-with. Being the first
year spent helping out at events rather than taking part, I feel like I have
moved on with my life. I don’t have a completely new beginning this year. It is
a new beginning, but one in which I do not have to carve my own identity into.
I have a support group around me. The safety of this familiarity is refreshing,
and allows me to really work hard at things other than making friends and being
on ‘first impression’ mode for the first term.
A year abroad alters the mind-set about how to face
challenges. To get the most of the year, you have to be able to go out and just
do things. Talk to people, take part in events, go along to things by yourself,
and not to be a wallflower. It gives someone courage to be clear about what
they want or don’t want from people. It’s a special kind of courage that lets
you get the most out of the year without regrets. You are able to say no to the
people you want to say no to, and prioritise your own agendas. Keeping this
going into your return to university is hard, as it is easy to slip back into
old habits, but hold out from doing this. Keep yourself and your life in the
forefront of your mind when committing to things. If you don’t really want to do
something, have the courage to say no.
The lack of immediate socialisation after being in halls for
two years makes it easy to fall back into isolation, and to lock yourself in
your room as a result. As a fresher no longer, things are not put onto a plate
easily for you. More effort has to be put in to find out what is going and what
is open to you. In order to see your friends, you have to actually go and see
your friends. There is very little immediate socialisation at all times of the
day, other than maybe a flatmate, and staying on track with work is much
harder. As a returning student you are expected to have a higher degree of
responsibility with your money, work load and social life. Simply signing up to
everything isn’t an option; you don’t have the time or money.
Returning from abroad is harder than you think it’s going to
be. You have to balance catching up with your old friends, while coping with the
loss of your friends abroad, and keeping up with your studies, as well as
looking forward what will happen when it is time to leave university. Just
remember, it won’t come immediately, but give it time, and you will strike your
own balance.
